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Here we go again; The Winter Blues

As you can probably tell from the content written about on this blog or even more explicit previous posts, I’m not a fan of winter. The colder temperatures, seemingly endless darkness and frequently disrupted plans due to weather, certainly put a damper on my mindset. I know that “This too Shall Pass”, that I’ll be hitting the fairways soon, but there’s no denying that the cold and darkness that this time of year brings, is not my thing.

I’ll admit it, I tend to overthink things which I suppose is ironic considering the brain injury. Speaking of that, here’s an totally unrelated memory that just was triggered: It was probably 4 or 5 years ago when I was speaking about living with a brain injury to a bunch of 1st and 2nd graders. With complete innocence, a young boy in the first row whose arm shot up so fast he could barely remain seated asked, “If you have a brain injury, can you still think?” You have to love the curiosity and honesty of a 7 year old! Anyways, now back to The Winter Blues…

By now most of us are familiar with SAD or Seasonal Affective Disorder, a form of depression that occurs during specific seasons, typically Fall and Winter. And while I completely understand that lack of sunlight and seasonal changes have real impacts on mental health, for myself, I have to admit that I may just “Up in my highchair banging my spoons” (to steal a line from my good friend Shane). Maybe rather than complaining or wallowing in self-pity for the less conducive to my preferred outdoor activities weather, I can be grateful for those nice days assured there will be more to come.

As I find myself veering off into the far reaches of my mind and possibly going off topic, I can’t seem to find the right word to introduce the observation I’ve made about my own thinking. Is it ironically/oddly/or perhaps just interestingly? Regardless, it seems that for the most part we think of acceptance in terms of difficulties or disappointment. However, I can just as easily find myself using self-sabotaging behavior or thinking when resisting the bounty of Grace in my life. The humility to refrain from being the high judge of outcomes and just live a mindful life sure doesn’t come naturally.

Perhaps, “Acceptance (really) is the answer to all my problems today”, including the weather. As I sit here and write this morning, a cold, hard rain is falling here on the Seacoast and it seems much of New England. Maybe I’m making progress because I found myself telling my roommate Ben, “this will probably help that drought we’re in.” Now to be honest, I feel like we’ve had plenty of rain, but the experts say we need it…

So whether it’s not the ideal conditions for a round of golf, my diminished physical/cognitive ability after brain injury, or  even the blessings and joy in my life; maybe just maybe, “that person, place, thing or situation [is] exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.”