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Learnings / Recovery

It’s the Journey

By Jim Scott

Oftentimes I find myself struck by reading or hearing something I hadn’t found that impactful when previously receiving the information. Usually this is something I jokingly chalk up to my memory issues post TBI, but I find many people regardless of medical history, see things differently as life experiences are accumulated. Just the other morning I read something that I usually only hear read out loud and the bells were ringing immediately. I couldn’t believe how the meaning of the passage completely changed when I noticed I had previously heard the phrase incorrectly.

I’ll start off by giving you the correct text: “Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the fellowship of the spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.” So how was I hearing the phrase, or rather, what was it that I had been internalizing over the countless times I’d heard it over the years? Well, in my defense, I only had a single word wrong: “Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the fellowship of the spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road to Happy Destiny.”

Just in case you missed it, and don’t worry because it took me almost a decade to notice, the correct phrase refers to the road as the happy destiny rather than leading to one. In fact, just by replacing the word “to” with the word “of” the entire meaning shifts. The words are actually an excerpt from pg. 164 of “The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous”. While having a lot to do with the value and support of community in recovery as well; when read correctly the text conveys that the happy destiny of life is the journey (trudging the road) not the destination.

Of course, as a person that can tend toward black or white thinking, my first impulse is to conclude, “Right on, goal setting and celebrating achievement is a waste of time.” Fortunately for me I’ve had some great people in my life who’ve emphasized that it’s always a good idea to run my first thought by someone. Upon further reflection and some discussion, the fact that as Henry Ward Beecher said: “We should not judge people by their peak of excellence; but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.” Not that I believe I can improve upon Mr. Beecher’s words, but I would emphasize the importance of celebrating a commitment to the process, not just the achievement or arrival!

 

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